Wednesday, October 1, 2008

The Scene
Work from 7 am to 6 pm. Everything goes smoothly. Blah.

Wormed my way out of a happy hour and went in search of some inspiration. Something beautiful. To lift my spirits.

Found just what I was looking for at Anthropologie aka Vagina Heaven. How unique is this nubby half wrap sweater? Delish. May have to pick it up in L.A.

Also loved this bow sweater. Very Moschino.

And this gorgeous black and white short-sleeved number! Looks like a structured jacket but is a very fine gauge sweater. Very Chanel on a dime. Love!

After feeding my spirit, it was time to feed my tummy. A Nor Cal native, Peaches recommended a dozen restaurants for me to try during my three day visit. That pig! One of them was the chichi Bong Su, a Vietnamese restaurant where he spent last New Year's Eve.

The decor was beautiful. But the food! Good god the food was some of the best I've ever had.

Started with the Mekong Martini: Lychee Vodka, Mango Nectar, Pressed Lime with Black Tea Tapioca Balls.

Then came the Crab Spring Rolls - Soft rice paper rolls of crisp soft shell crab, avocado & mint; served w/ a mango-kaffir lime sauce.

And then caramelized Black Cod in onion, garlic, black pepper & molasses.

Complemented perfectly by Coconut and Vanilla rice.

I think I had an orgasm at the table. Um, seriously. I'm not joking. Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally=me.

The Outfit
Vantage blue button down
Theory black slacks

The Accessories
Marc Jacobs pumps
Fashion District bangle
Chanel earrings

The Grade
W for Why Me? and Weeping and Worst Ever
and WTF!!!! and WHO Thought This Was a Good Idea

The Commentary
So my company mandates that all employees at tradeshows wear black pants or a skirt with...drum roll...a blue button down with the company's name embroidered over the left breast. {crying} I seriously considered quitting when I found out.

I just don't DO uniforms.

Have NEVER EVER had a job that required one.
Until now.

Confession: Blue button downs offend me. To the core. Oh sure I wore them in the late 90s in college. Because that's what you think you have to wear to look professional when you are 19 (apparently sparkly hose spell businesswoman too - BLECH!)

I wasn't the only one fooled. Peaches rocked the blue button down with black pants look too. But at least he's a boy. I am not only a woman. I am a girly creative fashionable woman.

And, I'm sorry but blue button downs don't make you a professional any more than wearing a white lab coat make you a doctor. F. This is all a sham, I wanted to scream all day today and rip off The Man's clothing.

Furthermore, button downs aren't a good look on the the thick waisted (aka me.) I avoid them like the plague. I need things that flow through the middle not hug.

Blue button downs also show, um, perspiration marks. And well I am THAT person that is ALWAYS hot and hence a bit of a sweat monster. So on top of feeling like a tragic corporate world joke I felt self conscious about my pits all day. UGH. Total and utter fashion nightmare.

Much prefer my after work outfit. Casual but still chic. Think anyone in their right mind would prefer to do business with a woman wearing this outfit instead of the tradeshow button down black and blue horror scene. Right? Right??????


WeezerMonkey said...

A boba martini!

I am your favorite thicker, sweatier monkey. I can't do button-downs. I always wear shells, camis, or even tees under my suits.

amy said...

certain dri. the perfect solution for the sweaty among us. and it is not filled with the harmful chemicals of regular deodorants. and you put it on at night (kind of hard to get used to), so a benefit is not having any marks on clothing (i.e. black shirts) from regular deodorants. and it really helps calm excessive sweating. not that i sell the stuff and not that i want to drag your wonderful blog down with armpit talk!

WendyB said...

That martini looks delicious. And I agree with Amy, Certain Dri is great.

MissJordyPants said...

WAIT no photo of you wearing the uniform!? sadness.

My work uniform on tradeshow days - white polo (that is at lest 4 sizes too large for me. It comes down to my knees) with the logo, khaki pants and tennis shoes. sick.

Diabolina 3.1 said...

ugh i am pretty sure i've tried certain dri. i know i need the prescription stuff but i know it can't be any good for you...

Ann Marie said...

I don't do button down shirts either. I do, however, think that I had those same 90s strappy heels in your college picture.

Tiffany said...

That black and white jacket/sweater is gorg. I will be making a stop at Anthro to take a look at it.

The uniform cracks me up. But it could be worse... My company's color is orange and black. every event that we have looks like halloween. They hand out orange tshirts. Me and orange do not work well together. I dodge the orange shirt every time.

Jean Bean said...

Someone invented pantyliners for armpits. You could try those in your blue shirt.

amber said...

yeah, your evening outfit was much cuter. and the food that you were noshing on while wearing said cute outfit looks/sounds divine!

Emily said...

I am so sorry that they did this to you. Do you sell used cars? No? Then you should not be wearing a uniform. Surely if you're standing near your booth, they'll be able to figure out what company you work for, even if you're dressed like a professional individual rather than a corporate drone. After work outfit was a hit, and now I want crab spring rolls!

lookrichbitch said...

"vagina heaven"? orgasm a la Sally? raise your hand if you're sure?

i think i just pooped my pants laughing at (or is it "with") you this time!


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