Tuesday, June 30, 2009

My Super Sweet Fashion Face Off
12 year old Diabolina v. 31 year old Diabolina
in shorts at a Hawaiian waterfall

WHAT WAS I THINKING? Look like a grandmother. Like the manly women I was just weeping over at Pearl Harbor. Ughs to the fugs. I blame that fro. And a Miller's Outpost sale. And puberty.

At least my white sandals were suh-weet. And what I wouldn't give for those mile long colt legs to make a reappearance. Must stop eating like a horse.
The Scene

Breakfast of champions followed by an hour for suckers.

Yesterday I found out that if we spent an hour learning about Marriott Resort timeshares, we'd get a hundred dollar gift spa certificate. Um, score.

Thought Mr. D would think I was ghetto for even suggesting it but he didn't. Apparently, he thinks we're still poor college kids too. YAY! What sounded like a good scheme yesterday, made me super anxious today. I don't like wasting people's time or having to say no. Thankfully, our salesman was not sleazy or about the hard sell. But he was extremely good at selling an attractive product.

For a hot second we even thought about signing on the dotted line. But figured we'd absorb all the information back home. Talk to friends who own timeshares. Can't go making $40,000 purchases when you're on a vacation high.

With a hundred spa dollars in our pocket, we proceeded with our original plan for the day: a road trip up to the north shore of Oahu.

The landscape wasn't nearly as lush as Maui's road to Hana but it was still a gorgeous drive.

Stopped by the Dole Plantation.

The house that pineapples built.

Picked up some souvineers and peeped lots and lots of pineapples

Next stop Turtle Bay

Secluded slice of paradise

Had cocktails with a side of stunning views

Unfortunately sand between our toes didn't make up for the AWFUL service we got during lunch.

They not only lost our order and made us wait about 45 minutes but then the dessert they offered to comp us took another half an hour to arrive. F that dump. Didn't even see any sweet turtles.

Next up the Polynesian Cultural Center

Lots of learning to do but we weren't really in the mood.

Fooled around instead

On the way back we wanted to try a few of the prawn trucks everyone raves about but we got a bit skeeved out by them

So instead I decided to take my white shrimp to the beach.

Love how I can't get enough of the beach on vacation but I rarely go back home.

Ended the day with a little room service and a movie. Heavenly day in heaven.

The Outfit
Fashion District romper

The Accesories
Fashion District sandals
Headband by Mr. Diabolina

The Grade

The Commentary

Built the outfit around the adorable braided headbands we made yesterday. Want to wear them every day all day.

The flowers matched my old coral necklace purrfectly. Felt like a Polynesian princess right down to the neckline of my romper.

Nabbed the romper in the same store as yesterday's white dream of a dress. Under $50.

Adding that store to my Recessionista tour of the Fashion District for shizzle.

Love the versatility of a black romper

Especially when traveling.

You can add a cool necklace

Or a jacket to completely change the vibe

Dress them down with flats

Or glam them up with heels

It's one summer piece that can take you from the beach

Straight to the red/green carpet ;)

As with any piece, it's all about the fit, material and how you accessorize.

Monday, June 29, 2009

My Super Sweet Fashion Face Off
11 year old Diabolina v. 31 year old Diabolina
in brown at a Hawaiian luau

I remember buying this plaid shorts outfit at Miller's Outpost (now known as Anchor Blue) with my mom. Along with peach jeans. The 80s were so deliciously tragic.

Thank god for Forever 21 in 2009. And Brazilian blowouts. Above is how kinky my hair normally looks on vacation after a day at the beach. Dios mio it's glorious to be a wash and go girl.

This fashion face off goes to the elder D. Fo shizzle.
The Scene

This morning I ate all this. Don't judge me. My brain needed sustenance. Instead of lounging around and frolicking in the water, today we had a date to get our American history edumacation on.

I'd been really really excited for Pearl Harbor for weeks. But my mister who has a B.A. in history, almost went to the Air Force Academy instead of USC and owns his own boat was probably more excited.

Visited the USS Missouri first. When the tour guide referred to the battleship as "the Mighty Mo", Mr. Diabolina muttered under his breath it was the purrrrfect ship for me.

This hag almost died laughing.

"Big Mo" (BWAHAHAHHA!) is a United States Navy Iowa-class battleship, and was the fourth ship of the US Navy to be named in honor of a state.

It was the last battleship built by the United States, and was the site of the surrender of the Empire of Japan which ended World War II.

Was fascinating and humbling to see how navy men lived back in the battleship days.

Whole new respect for what people in the armed services endure to keep us safe.

It was particularly meaningful for Mr. Diabolina.

His paternal granddaddy was a Chief Petty Officer. Love BFDs.

Next we took a boat out to the USS Arizona.

The memorial wasn't exactly what I expected.

I didn't expect to see a ship visible in the water.


900 men lay entombed in the waters there.

On the ship they once called home.

Extremely sobering to think of the horror and chaos that happened that December morning in 1941 against this beautiful backdrop.

Especially after having lived through 9/11.

And good lord what about those recent North Korean missile threats, huh? Would be lying if I said that hasn't been in the back of my mind the last few days. What are the odds we'd be in Hawaii the week bananas would be threatening the US?

Thankfully, Mr. Diabolina had a wonderful (capitalistic) distraction planned for the second half the day: shopping at Ala Moana, the world's largest outdoor shopping center!!!!!

Mr. Diabolina and I read all about it in Deluxe: How Luxury Lost Its Luster which chronicles the evolution of luxury brands and the mall-ification of the US.

There's a whole chapter that details how Japanese women flock to the Ala Moana to buy designer goods. Mr. D knew I'd have to see it for myself.

And I knew that Mr. Diabolina better be nice and full if he was going to shop for more than 15 minutes without getting ornery and fussy like a baby so we got a delish lunch at the Pineapple Room :)

Then we visited the first Chanel store in the US. Talk about BFDs. Mr. Diabolina wanted to get my birthday present there but frankly I didn't see anything I couldn't live without. Crazy stupid on my part, I know. Think all this health stuff is making me soft in the cabeza. Or maybe it's giving me perspective.

So we peeped Neiman's and their big sale instead.

Drooled over Marni

Marc Jacobs


And Phillip Lim

DVF that I've pined over for months

And DVF I never knew existed.

Even tried on the ultimate summer home run: a Tory Burch maxi with built in statement necklace for 40 percent off.

Mr. D wouldn't let me leave without two v. pretty items. Early bday presents. Unlike my mom, he said I can wear them before my birthday but I think I'll wait. And build some suspense ;)

When we got back to the resort it was time for every Howley's favorite: the luau

No Howley's Hawaii trip is complete without poi

And hula girls

Gorgeous evening for a luau.

This one had spear throwing and canoeing

And girl reindeer games like bracelet and headband making.

Sad to report, Mr. D was better at making the purty trinkets than me.

Think he was even better at wearing them. SO PRETTY!

Fabulous third day. Didn't know they made Mondays this amazing.

The Outfit
Fashion District tunic/Forever 21 maxi

The Accessories
Me&Ro necklace
Chanel sunglasses
Fashion District ring and bracelet
Stuart Weitzman sandals

The Grade

The Commentary

This is what most women were wearing at the Pearl Harbor memorial. Made me want to weep for our country.

Why in the world would a woman dress like a man when we can dress like WOMEN?? As I've said before, a dress and sandals are JUST as easy to throw on as shorts, a tshirt and sneakers, so I'm not buying the comfort argument.

Newsflash: men like women who look feminine. During the work week, on the weekends, and ESPECIALLY on vacation.

If they wanted to be with someone who dressed like them, they'd be mos. F.

Sure I felt like I stood out today. But I have enough confidence to know that I stood out in a GOOD way.

In fact several of the women who work at the memorial, complimented my dress. It's like they were starving for fashion that wasn't functional or frump city.

The minute I saw this glorious dress in downtown I knew I had to have it for this vacation. Nothing else would do.

It is boho chic perfection.


And DVF-esque

But just a fifth of the price - HOLLLLLLLA!

Felt so elegantly fabulous with the bat wings that I almost forgot. Almost forgot that I was unwell and popping pills all day ;(

Heart how similar it is to the dress our First Lady wore to the White House Luau. LOVE!

But the best part: it matched my ring perfectly!!!! The Fashion District is the best thing that ever happened to me. Stamp.

Had planned to wear the dress to the luau but knew I'd get it dirty. So instead I opted for a maxi I bought today. At F21 in Ala Moana. Just $20.

Bought it because Mr. Diabolina has been remarking on maxis quite a bit lately. And I think it's important to pay attention to what he likes. Me thinks that's one of the secrets to a relationship that lasts 11 years.

One thing about the dress that I didn't like but he loooooved? The fact that my boobs were practically falling out. Bought it too big. F.

Have to figure out how to fix the straps when we get back to the mainland so I stay tucked in and PG-13 instead of X-rated.

Thankfully my lei came to the rescue and covered up the goodies. Confession: I am obsessed with leis. Think it goes back to my high school and college graduations. All I ever wanted was my mom to buy me a lei to wear over my graduation gown. But since we are in no way Hawaiian that didn't dawn on her.

The morning of my master's graduation, I thought maybe I'd finally get one but my mom had oral surgery that day. Worst parenting call on her part EVER. Claimed she couldn't get another appointment for months. She showed up doped up, barely able to talk and needless to say without a lei. I'm still bitter.

So tonight I was in seventh heaven with my maxi and my beautiful lei. Like one of the cool girls. Like I'd arrived...finally :)

My best dressed award goes to the beautiful dancers. Love love loved the costumes.

Especially the skirts. So Project Runway.

Mr. D's fave: the FLESH COLORED coconut bras.

It's like they were made for his chester-viewing pleasure.

He's loved bras all his life but fell in love with the coconut variety at his first Hawaii luau back in 2004.

Gawd, we looked like babies back then.

Most barely dressed award goes to this chickie. Mr. D and I couldn't figure out if it was a bra or a swimsuit.

I just don't get the young hoochie coochies nowadays. I mean why bother wearing anything at all?

Favorite trend of the evening: floral.

Most women had pretty kitty flowers in their hair and around their necks and on their dresses. Some even had them on their skin thanks to temporary tattoo artists floating around the luau.

But I'm the only one that had a Dior-inspired garden on my wrist - yea to certain special people clubs :)


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